THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PHOTOGRAPH A TURKEY
Cooking a turkey — like having a baby — is something that people take far too much pride in doing when you consider the amount of actual skill involved, and much liking babies, people love taking pictures with them when they finally pop out of the oven.
It’s important to remember not to let go.
MY HAM LOOKS LIKE A … !
This is what happens when you serve ham at Thanksgiving, stick to tradition or you’ll get this.
AT LEAST THERE’S ALWAYS DESSERT… UNLESS YOU RUIN THAT TOO
There’s a reason most recipies don’t contain the term “cook until blacker than a moonless night on an empty ocean.”
IT HELPS TO KEEP THE FILLING INSIDE THE CRUST
At least they didn’t burn anything.
THE QUICKEST WAY TO TURN YOUR LOVED ONES INTO MORTAL ENEMIES IS TO BURN THE ROLLS
The last things you ever want to do is take away someone’s semi-annual excuse to load up on empty carbs.
SWEET POTATO CASSEROLE NORMALLY REQUIRES A PAN
I’m not sure what happened there and I’m not sure that I want to know.
FOOD ISN’T THE ONLY DISASTER WAITING TO HAPPEN
I think we can all agree that the true meaning of Thanksgiving is avoiding a house fire that destroys everything you own.
LIFE IS SO MUCH EASIER WHEN YOU’RE INNOCENT
For example, I bet the person responsible for this cake didn’t even realize what their turkey looked like.
SOMETIMES PROFESSIONALS MAKE MISTAKES TOO
What a crappy cupcake (the joke here is that the turkey on the right looks like poop).
I GOT 99 PROBLEMS AND TURKEY IS ONE
You can debate the exact definition of “golden brown” as much as you want, and I know for a fact that the picture on the right will never meet the specifications.
IS CORNBREAD SUPPOSED TO DO THAT?
Making cornbread isn’t that hard, and cornbread should definitely never be that hard.
CRANBERRY SAUCE REQUIRES A LITTLE BIT OF PREPARATION
At least try to make it look presentable.