If death were a creature, ‘inventiveness’ is one attribute we could surely associate with it. Because, as now know, there are an infinite number of situations that can cause somebody’s death. But only a small portion of these possible situations actually shock us. Today we will be sharing 10 such examples of death’s bizarre creativity that left people astounded. Find them below.
10. David Douglas (1834)
How? Steamrolled by a bull.
Mr. Douglas was a great explorer in his own right. A Glasgow, Scotland Botanist, he was hired by Hudson’s Bay Company to explore the Oregon territory and catalog the plants growing there. So well known was he that they named a tree that he “discovered” in his honor and the Douglas Fir was born. (Figuratively speaking) In later years, he was living and working in Hawaii when he fell into a pit dug to trap wild bulls and was trampled to death by the animals. Can you imagine being gored and trampled by a trapped wild bull?
9. Jean-Baptiste de Lully (1687)
How? Staffed himself in the toe.
Jean-Baptiste Lully was an Italian born composer who became a Frenchman in the king’s court. So impressed was his majesty at some small piece of work this guitar/violinist/dancer composed for a small part of a play that he made Jean-Baptiste the First Composer of Instrumental Music to the King, a title that led to his formation of his own band of musicians, Petits Violons. Eventually, his interest in this form of music waned as dramatically as did his ability to dance, another of Jeans talents that satisfied the King. He went on to be a great Operatic composer until his death in March 1687. In those times, it was standard for the composer/conductor to beat a staff upon the floor in keeping time with the music. Jean-Baptiste de Lully accidentally hit himself on the big toe during a performance and developed gangrene that spread rapidly. His refusal to have the toe amputated led to his eventual and horrible death as the poison spread into his blood. He died an agonizing death.
8. Sir Arthur Aston (1694)
How? Beaten to death with his own wooden leg.
Sir Arthur Aston was a great career soldier and leader for King Charles despite being looked upon as a nonconformist and his religious beliefs (Catholic) were frowned upon as well. This is probably the main reason that, although he had attained the rank of Major, he was never as famous or as respected as other military leaders of his time, which include the likes of Major Mackay. Sir Aston also achieved notoriety in his appointment to Governor of Oxford. It was during this time that a fall from a horse cost him his leg. Later, after losing a terrible battle for the garrison of Drogheda, he tried unsuccessfully to negotiate surrender but the entire town was ordered to be put under the sword. It was on a bridge during this failed negotiation that the enemy officers, believing there were gold coins in the hollow of the wooden leg and disappointed that there were none, beat Sir Arthur Aston to death with it. A great and noble man beaten to death with his own wooden leg is an inglorious end to an otherwise glorious career.
7. William Huskisson (1830)
How? Steamrolled at the first public opening of the world’s first mechanically powered passenger railway.
William Huskisson, British statesman, member of Parliament, and expert in finance, he had an illustrious political career but, perhaps his biggest claim to fame was that of being the first railway death to receive extensive coverage in the news of the times. Huskisson was riding on the same train as the Duke of Wellington. He opened one of the train’s doors, which, unfortunately, was bigger than the gap between the train he was on, and the new train “The Rocket” which was traveling in the opposite direction on the set of tracks next to his, The Rocket hit the door, which hit Huskisson, throwing him off balance and under the Rocket’s wheels. This did not kill him instantly but the damage to his legs was so intensive that he died in Eccles a few hours later.
6. Clement Vallandigham (1871)
How? Accidentaly shot himself in the (head)?
Clement Vallandigham was a politician, newspaper editor, and supporter of the confederacy during the civil war, voting against every military action brought before the house. After giving a speech in May of 1861 in which he referred to President Lincoln as King Lincoln, he was arrested and tried for uttering disloyal sentiments against the Union. Lincoln later released him and had him transported to Tennessee via the underground network. After the war, he returned to his home in Ohio and became a defense attorney. In his last case, he was defending a man who, during a barroom brawl was accused of killing one of the participants. Vallandigham was attempting to show how the man who was killed had accidentally killed himself while attempting to draw a pistol from his pants. Unfortunately, he did this with a loaded gun. He proved his point, accidentally killing himself. The Jury found the man innocent and released him. Wow, talk about a passionate lawyer!
5. John Kendrick (1794)
How? By a salute from his friend.
John Kendrick was an American sea captain descended from a long line of seafaring men. A patriot, John was one of the men who dumped tea in the Boston harbor to demonstrate our distaste for taxation without representation. After commanding several ships during the war and making a name for himself as a fierce naval fighter, he went back to whaling and fur trading. He was later commissioned as an American explorer and given a ship, the Columbia. Accompanied by the Lady Washington, which he eventually wound up commanding, he set sail from America on a mission of discovery. Many years later, several American ships, including the Lady Washington and the Jackal, a ship whose captain was known for his distaste of Captain Kendrick, helped a Hawaiian chief defeat a rival tribe for the island that is now Honolulu. After the battle, the two ships saluted one another in victory by firing their cannons. Unfortunately, the other ship, The Jackal, had loaded a real volley and a round hit The Lady Washington, killing Captain Kendrick and his staff. Coincidence? You decide.
4. Humphrey de Bohun (1322)
How? Speared through the anus.
Humphrey de Bohun was involved in many battles with the Scots over the course of his life, mostly victorious although after one particularly nasty defeat against Robert the Bruce, he had to go into self-exile, losing his lands and titles. His death was a very nasty one and I pray that I do not have to go through this when my time comes. While leading a charge over a wooden bridge in Boroughbridge, Yorkshire, an enemy Scot, hidden under the bridge, thrust his spear up and skewered Bohun through the anus and into his body cavity. His screams of agony were so great that they un-nerved his troops, forcing them into retreat. The day was lost along with his virginity.
3. Sigurd the Mighty (892)
How? Killed by his dead enemy’s bad dental hygiene.
Siguad’s death is one of irony and proof positive that justice always finds a way in the end. Sigurd was a mighty leader and fierce warrior. During his last campaign, he challenged his enemy, Mael Brigte, the Buck-Toothed to a 40 on 40-man battle to decide their war. Sigurd then cheated, bringing 80 men–he defeating Brigte the Buck-toothed and won the day. Not one to leave well enough alone, Sigurd strapped his enemy’s head to his saddle and rode in front of the dead, buck-toothed leaders people to show how great Sigurd thought he was. Unfortunately, while riding around with the head, the dead man’s buckteeth scraped against Sigurd the idiots leg so often that it caused a scratch, which became infected and killed Sigurd within weeks. If only Sigurd the unfortunate had used a spike instead of strapping the man’s buck-toothed head between his legs, he may have lived just a bit longer.
2. Jack Daniel (1911)
How? By forgeting his safe’s combination.
Jack Daniel is famous for Jack Daniel’s, the sour mash that is the life and death of many parties across the world. Jack did not have a head for numbers and this was his undoing. He went to work early one morning and in a fit of frustration, kicked his safe when he could not get it open. He could not remember the combination and usually left this task to his nephew, whom he had hired to keep the books. The big toe on his foot became infected and he died. His last words were to request a final drink. Many experts believe he would have lived had he known that alcohol would have warded off an infection if he had soaked his foot in it. If there was anyone on the planet that had access to alcohol, it was Jack Daniels.
1. Franz Reichelt (1912)
How? By seeing too many Superman movies.
Franz Reichelt is the inventor of the parachute and parachuting. Need I say more? Well, I will anyway. He would throw practice dummies off the roof of his five-story building but claimed that any failures he experienced were due to the lack of height. After many years of partitioning the government for use of the Eiffel Tower, he was finally given permission and many people, including the media and cameras of the day were in attendance. He announced that he was so confident in his theory that he would not be using a dummy and would jump off the tower himself and land gracefully for the entire world to see. His landing was as graceful as it could be considering he was moving at 115 miles per hour when he hit the ground. The chute did not open.